I want results for me! Me! Me!

I made a pledge to myself a year ago. I will live my life in ways I’m happy for my kids to copy. My kids are adopted. They had a tough start and we were advised that they would experience all kinds of deficits in terms of their development. Many believe these deficits are permanent….

Day 19: What a difference a day makes

I’ve been a cow the last couple of days. Not to put too fine a point on it. I’ve been grumpy, intolerant and miserable and it took nothing to send me over the edge. This morning, still feeling a little prickly, I decided to take the morning off from my usual routine and seek some…

Day 17: Darkness, broken eggs and hangovers

I woke up with a hangover this morning. Let me explain. Mood swings and low-level depression have formed part of my existence my entire life. I have actively resisted taking medication despite being advised on several occasions that this was my best option. I managed well enough and, before the kids, I’d say I was…

Day 16: Turning away

I’m sitting in the waiting room at Mini’s play therapy session as I type this. For a variety of reasons, I hate coming here. This place is a weekly reminder of all she’s been through, all she still has to go through and all the complications of our story – plus, she comes out of…

It’s easier to stay angry

I’m filled with negative emotion. I think it’s anger but I’m not 100% sure. There’s a good amount of resentment, guilt, shame and fear in there too. The source of all these emotions? My daughter. After her play therapy session last week, the therapist sat us both down to talk. It seems “the mess” is…