Day 20: Embracing the Mess

James read my blogs recently. He’s concerned I’m making myself sound “like an alcy”. He wondered whether this sort of oversharing is the right way to go, considering all that I hope Big Happy Life will become in future.

I think it is. What I’m realising from the blogs I follow and the books and articles I read is that the breakthroughs happen in the mess. When things are smooth sailing, there are unlikely to be huge epiphanies. It’s when we push ourselves to do new things, test our strength and break our patterns that we find new information and since I want to be in the business of helping people do that, it felt dishonest to leave this particular stone unturned.

Am I an alcoholic? No, but I’m super curious about the ‘mess’ I’ll kick up by walking away from it for 100 days. I’m curious about how my identity will shift, whether or not my mind and body will start to communicate better with each other, what will happen to my moods and energy and…will my hair get shinier?

In addition to that, I simply needed to show myself I could do it. Not just that I could do it but that I could do it easily by using the rest of my habits to create flow and make this feel more manageable and more fun. I’m basically testing the ideas, ideals and advice offered in Big Happy Life on myself. So if I don’t make it to the 100 day mark, I’d argue that I have more than one big problem on my hands. Of course if I succeed and it continues to be this easy…well…that’s exciting.

 

4 Comments Add yours

  1. Is James the hubby? Does he blog?
    Therapy in blogging is the oversharing. My hubby talks of blogging but he could never put his feelings out there like I do.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Big Happy Life says:

      Yeah, he’s my hubby and doesn’t blog. I agree, the oversharing is pretty cathartic. I wonder how many people blog precisely because they struggle to put their feelings out. There’s something great about the anonymity of it (for those who choose to write anonymously). Perhaps it’s quite freeing?

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      1. It is quite freeing. I write sorta-anonymously, but under my pseudonym. When I get open, I write truthfully, I’m not expecting anyone I know to read because they don’t care enough to read my feelings. And it’s fine because I don’t have to censor.

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      2. Big Happy Life says:

        Great that blogging provides that outlet for you. It’s wonderful to be able to express yourself without censoring. I hope the people in your life care enough to listen to your feelings even if they don’t read your blog. I don’t think anyone I know reads my blog though the feelings expressed here are the same as those I talk about. It’s the goals and habits stuff I keep to myself most of the time. Most people I know aren’t into that stuff. 😊

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